Yes, it's true. You got it here first. The North Koreans may send a rocket's red glare out over the Pacific on the Fourth of July. How anyone can think that this rocket launch might be anything but a friendly gesture from the Beloved Leader himself. Well, the Defense Department is amused and has said that the launch was expected. This might upset the North because it sort of gives it away....we all like surprises, don't we? It is not known whether the famous American fireworks family, the Gruccis have had anything to do with this launch.
As you know, rockets over NYC were prohibited by former Mayor Giuliani in a show strength against the Chinese years ago. Oh, that was Chinese in Chinatown, that is. Do not panic and stock pile and more than you already have for a normal July 4th catastrophe. Ice, beer, condiments; DVD's and hard liquor for the real men among you, girls included. I will be joining some Constitutional scholars at a Constitution burning and BBQ at Foley Square. Later, we will g to the Joyce Theater for the experimental dance of the Federalists Papers, performed by The Paul Taylor dancers.....
Happy Rockets and Rockeets to you all
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